A Clear Rejection...

Promise and Lie have almost the same meaning to me.
Ever since I was around 15 I have experienced so many lies. And so many broken promises.
And it's ok.
Except really, it's not ok.
Lie's are not ok.
Lies are horrible, hurtful, and can cause a lot of damage.
And so can broken promises.
But those saying the lies, or breaking the promises, don't realise the hurt they cause.
The damage they cause.
And later will question why you have changed.
Because they don't understand what they have done wrong.

Which is quite sad really, isn't it?
We experienced lies from my dad before, during and after he left us.
And that wasn't ok. We were left confused. Even now, 13 years on there is still a huge amount of confusion. And I think, from me, there is a confusion over how someone I loved so much, and cared for and admired so much, could lie to me the way he did. He made promises when he married my mum, which he broke, and I believe that when you become a parent you make certain promises.
You don't have to stand in front of a church or room full of people and make a declaration. You don't have to say those promises out loud for everyone to hear, to sign your name on an official document to say that you will stick by those promises.
The promises you make to your children are unwritten.
They are obvious, and unwritten. You don't need to say them.
I don't need to write them here, because we know what they are.
You don't even need to be a parent to know the promises.

But when a parent breaks those promises, not just once, but a few times, over a number of years, you can't help but feel confused.
You beat yourself up.
Why am I not good enough?
Why doesn't he love me?
Why are they better than me?
What can I do to change?
Why do I keep chasing him?
And you confront him, and he tells you he loves you.
He tells you he is proud of you.
He tells you he'll make the effort.
And then once again, you are beating yourself up.

A never ending cycle.

It would be ok if maybe it was just your one parent doing this.
But when friends do it too, you really do feel confused.

You open your heart out. Tell them your inner most secrets and feelings.
You trust them.
Maybe too easily.
I tend to take people into my heart too easily I think. And maybe that is my problem.
But then why should it be?
How long do you need to be friends with someone until you let them in?

I don't know you. Yet writing this, and you reading it, means I'm letting you in, right?

And I'm ok with that, because this isn't too personal.
And I haven't gone into too much detail.

I figure that right now I will always find it hard to trust everyone.
To believe promises.
And I hope that one day I am able to see a promise and a lie with two completely opposite meanings.

EverEarth Table Top Easel {Review}

With Charles starting reception in September I'm keen on him starting there able to write his name.
He's been able to write his own name for a while now, but the letters are normally HUGE so I'm trying to get him to write smaller and to also practise other letters as well as numbers.
I wanted to get into a routine of doing this at some point everyday, either in the morning, afternoon or after dinner.
Of course doing this means we go through a lot of paper. A lot. And it seems like such a waste when we just end up throwing it all away.
So, blackboard and chalk is perfect for this activity.

EverEarth have created a very handy double sided easel. The easel consists of a blackboard and a whiteboard. The whiteboard can be used with white board markers and is also magnetic, so we've been using the blackboard and have been attaching paper onto the whiteboard using the pretty magnets which are attached via a small rope.

When first getting the easel out of it's box I could immediately feel how solid it is and how well made it is. It's "manufactured to a high standard using environmentally friendly materials from renewable forests"
The easel folds up small so it is easy to store and has a little cut out handle making it easy to transport. It will stand on any table top and is really secure. There are two wooden pins (or pegs) either side which fix the easel open, these are also really solid and well made and it would take a lot for these to be broken.

The easel is recommended for ages 3+ although I have let Harry play with it too.
The easel costs £31.14 and is available to buy via the CostCuttersUk shop.

About CostCutters:

As a family run business, well established within the education industry with over 30 years experience, we understand the importance of excellent service and reliability for your education supplies needs.

We are based in the heart of the Midlands, in Staffordshire - yet we comfortably cover and service all of mainland UK. Wherever you are in the UK, we can provide friendly, professional advice on all our educational products and delivery service.

Our team of staff are trained to the highest standards and our aim is to keep your purchasing experience as hassle-free as possible for you.

 We were sent the EverEarth Double Sided Easel for the purpose of this review.

Marshmallow Pops

Mmmmm mmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Ok, so we might not be throwing Charles a birthday party but we will have having his aunty and uncle over the Sunday before and then my mum the Saturday after, therefore I have a fantastic excuse to play with yummy nibbles.
I found these on the internet and thought they would look fab and taste rather lovely. Added to the fact they are easy and cheap to make.
They are too easy for me to need to tell you how to make them but I can at least give some tips to help you on your way.

Step one: Put the marshmallow on the end of a skewer.
Step two: Dip the marshmallow into some melted chocolate. My tip here is to dip and twist the marhmallow into the chocolate to guarantee more coverage. Obviously you can dip as much of the marshmallow as you like. I just wanted the top dipped on the majority of mine.
Step three: Dip the marshmallow + chocolate into the sprinkles. Again, dip and twist for maximum coverage. I tend to then leave the marshmallow in the bowl for around 5 minutes so it begins to set. This also means the chocolate is less likely to run and the sprinkles fall everywhere.
Step four: Transfer onto a plastic chopping board or into a plastic tub to set.
Step five: Place in a cup/vase/jar and serve

You can use any sprinkles you like. I also used chunks of apples too.
We will be making these with white chocolate for Charles' birthday celebrations too.

 

 

{My Week That Was Update}

For the record, I'm not pretending this is a big announcement, it's just easier to put it here for those who may (or may not if this week is anything to go by) come to find the 'My Week That Was' link up. I won't be continuing with it, for a few reasons.

The main reason being that it's making me feel a little uncomfortable and something isn't quite sitting right with me. I won't go into any more than that.

Thanks to those who have linked up. I've really appreciated it.

 

Four Years of Experiences

Looking back on the last 4 years in the run up to Charles' birthday I can't help but feel proud at the things we have done with him, the experiences he has had and the places he has gone.

Holidays to Centre Parcs (twice, in his first year)
We took our car on a train and went camping in France at 13 months old.
On a plane for a week in Lanzarote at 22 months old.
A weekend break to Drayton Manor.
A weekend break to London.
A couple of overnight stays at your aunty and uncles house in the Midlands and an overnight stay at Cambridge, at Silverstone and at St Neots.
A weekend break for his auntys wedding.
A week at Butlins, Bognor Regis.

We've visited some amazing places.
2 car museums, an air museum, various zoo's and farms, a secret bunker, the National Space Centre, Thomas Land, a Steam Museum a couple of times, a History Museum, a Science Museum, an old work house and two Sea Life Centres. Not forgetting 3 or 4 visits to the Dinosaur Park.
We've been to 3 different race circuits, visited castles, and once popped to London just for lunch.

We've been to many beaches along the Norfolk and Suffolk Coast, watched an air show every year and celebrated the Queens Jubilee on the beach.
We've walked in woods, and on marshland.
He's ridden a horse and a donkey.
We've visited a few country fayres, and the Royal Norfolk Show.

He's held a snake, touched a tortoise, touched a starfish, anemone and held a crab.
Fed a goat, cow, sheep and bottle fed lambs.

He's been on various theme park and fairground rides. Seen a few firework displays and had a day out on a boat.
He's been on various trains and steam trains.

And he's started preschool.

Plus lots more.
When I look at all of these things I wonder how or why I question my parenting and doubt myself as a mother.
I think I'm doing ok.

Stamptastic {Review}

With Charles starting Primary School in September I'm already starting a mental list of things we need to buy and arrange.

• Uniform
• Shoes
• Bag
• Lunchbox
• Sports Bag
• Those tricky annoying sew in name labels
• A decent pen to write Charles' name onto the name labels
• Cotton to sew the name labels in

Accept, the last three things on that list, which probably feature on other mums lists around the UK, are completely unnecessary thanks to a wonderful invention and product.

Stamptastic is the baby of Emma, Francesca and Rie, 3 busy mums who could never find the time to sew or iron labels and wanted to find an alternative, and something they could use on everything.
After a year of planning Stamptastic was born!

Stamping is so quick and simple that we decided to start with a personalised stamp and then create an ink that is usable on a wide variety of materials.

Each stamp can include up to 20 letters (including spaces) and ink is supplied with each stamp.
The prices are as follows:

1 Stamp £16.99 | 2 Stamps £25.00 | 3 Stamps £32.50
4 Stamps £39.50 | 5th Stamp FREE
Only one inkpad per order – NOT one inkpad per stamp
FREE P&P to mainland UK. £3.50 international delivery.

  You may think that £16.99 is expensive or maybe pricey when you can pick up sew in, or iron in, labels so cheap but you must consider the fact that these stamps can be used on everything.
Clothes, pencils, paper, lunchboxes, plastic rulers etc. For the ease of being able to quickly pick up the stamp, hold it on the ink then press onto the item required it is definitely worth the price. Especially as it is personalised of course.

The stamps are amazing quality and really easy to hold due to ridges down the side of the stamp. The ink again is good quality and I think will last a long time.

I was really impressed with this stamp and think it will save a lot of time when it comes to personalising Charles' clothes, bags and accessories ready for big boy school.

I was sent this product shown above for the purpose of this review.

#worryeater Sorgenfresser

I know what you're thinking. What is Sorgenfresser or what does it mean?

Sorgenfresser, which translated exactly means ‘worry-eaters’ is a German phenomenon and a truly innovative concept for children and young people. This truly unique collection of plush friends has been designed especially to bridge the communication gap between adults and children and launches in the UK this week. To celebrate a life size Sorgenfresser is visiting London!

When children are worried about something they can simply write or draw on a piece of paper and pop it into Sorgenfresser’s mouth before zipping it away - out of sight and out of mind. Whether it’s a bad dream, a worry about Mum or Dad or school bullies, children are encouraged to share their feelings with their Sorgenfresser. Given that 64% of parents said they like to comfort their child by discussing their worries this is a great way to make that first step.

In a new survey commissioned by Coiledspring Games it has been revealed that nearly 50% of parents think their children worry just as much as they did when they were younger and disturbingly more than a third think they worry more. The survey of more than 200 also exposed that over a third of the people who took part claimed that their children only shared their worries with them ‘sometimes’ and 18% of the parents asked said their children do not share their worries at all.

Understandably the traditional worries were cited with the dark, spiders and nightmares being the three most common. Parents know how to deal with these, more normal concerns, but what about those parents whose little ones are not always communicating about their worries. Children may not know how to express themselves or even understand their feelings making it harder to explain their worry; they may also feel uncomfortable or embarrassed talking about certain issues so they chose not to share their thoughts. If a child is keeping a worry to themselves it can easily manifest into something further down the line.

This week a life-size Sorgenfresser will be hitting the streets of London to help solve the nation’s worries! Visiting places such as the London Eye and Dungeons he’ll be on hand to help anybody worried about heights, ghosts or anything else. Sorgenfresser are on a mission to inspire children and adults of any age across the UK to share their troubles.
These are a few more of the statistics from the survey of 230 parents undertaken between 1st and 8th May 2013 on Survey Monkey.com

• 63% of parents used a teddy bear, comfort blanket or soft toy as a comforter
• 33.7% of parents think their children worry more than they did (48% think they worry the same amount)
• 40% believe their child is afraid of the dark
• Only 9.7% think their child is worried about family relations
• 37% of parents say their child ‘sometimes’ tells them when they are worried about something, 31% claim their child ‘always’ tells them
• 87% of parents comfort a child with a cuddle with 64% comforting them by discussing the problem
• 4% of parents said they used to worry about their physical appearance yet nearly 16% of them think that their children worry about theirs
• 8% of those asked use to be concerned about bullying but nearly 22% of them think that their children worry about bullying.

I think the statistics are very interesting. I for one expected the last two points to be a much higher percentage, mainly due to my own worries. What are your thoughts on the results?

Are there any worries you would put in Sorgenfresser’s mouth and zip away? Join in the conversation on Twitter by using the hashtag #worryeater

I'm Going To BritMums Live {The Link Up Post}

Name: Lauren

Blog: Real Housewife of Suffolk County

Twitter ID: @LaurenInSuffolk

Height: 5ft 5

Hair: Blonde

Eyes: Blue, surrounded by lashes covered in mascara

Is this your first blogging conference?
Yes 

Are you attending both days?
If Friday doesn't scare me too much then yes

What are you most looking forward to at BritMums Live 2013?
Meeting up (or simply just being in the same room) as other bloggers I really admire, and have been talking to for two years.
I'm also stupidly excited about being in the same room as Kirstie Allsopp, my idol-the reason I craft, learnt to sew, wear dresses and joined the WI! and Katy Hill, when I was younger my Saturday mornings consisted of staying in bed until lunchtime whilst she was hosting Saturday Morning tv and my evenings were spent watching her on Blue Peter (I didn't just watch those programmes for her I must add, I'm not some crazed stalker)

What are you wearing?
Well, I have two maxi dresses which I hope to wear, but will also be taking my bargain Joules skirt, a vest and cardigan in case I'm not brave enough to wear one of the dresses.
My Joules skirt also matches my notepad so it feels rude not to wear it.

What do you hope to gain from BritMums Live 2013?
Confidence and to be able to recognise which direction to take my blog as I have a few things I want to do, but I'm not sure how to do them.

Tell us one thing about you that not everyone knows.
I love love LOVE having my blood pressure taken.

I'm going to BritMums thanks to my wonderful sponsors Medela UK.

B is for Bento

Ever since our last Bento Box Charles has been begging me everyday for another 'garden lunch'. Even asking my mum if she could make him some ants, benches and apricot border.
We really enjoyed our garden theme and also the alphabet. I thought going through the alphabet will be an easy way to teach Charles which foods begin with each letter.
This time of course our letter was 'B'.
I need to buy some boxes to put the food in really. This pink one (yes, pink for a boy!) is just the bottom of a cheese grater tub but it was perfect to arrange his feast in.
I also found some mini weaning pots which I haven't seen for well over a year! These were perfect to place the biscuits and fruit in and will come in handy in the future I'm sure.

Once again Charles really enjoyed it and ate everything. I love how I can feel confident that he's going to preschool with a full tummy and he's getting a variety of foods rather than just a simple sandwich. He also takes his time with it and doesn't rush his food like usual.

We can't wait for C.

A Birthday with No Party

This year we are not having a birthday party for Charles.
*Sounds of gasps and tuts*
In fact last year he didn't have a party, alternatively he had a day out with two of his friends to the local Dinosaur Park (as well as various celebrations with family), but this year we won't be doing anything like that.

Although Charles now goes to preschool and has more friends than ever, and spending a couple of mornings at the school I can see that he is a popular boy, we have still made the decision to not have a party for him,
We considered, briefly, hiring out a local community centre, getting a bouncy castle in and getting some nibbles, but then who do and don't you invite?
Do I invite every single child at preschool? The ones he doesn't play with? The ones he doesn't really know or who don't know him? What if the friends he really wanted to come didn't turn up?

With him going to reception in September we know he will make more friends, and these friendships will be a lot more solid than the friendships he has now because he will be with these friends a lot more.
Anyway, I digress. So next year will be even more important for him to celebrate with his friends, so it makes it easier for us to accept that it's ok for him not to have a party this year.

There is also the fact that in June there is simple no time to really have a party!
Every weekend is full of plans and annoyingly the Sunday after his birthday, the day we would usually have his party, is Fathers Day, therefore everyone will be busy celebrating that.

The Sunday before his birthday we will be celebrating with his aunty and uncle, then on his birthday we will take him out for the day, the Saturday will be a celebration with my mum, then the Sunday we will do something for Fathers Day. The following weekend is BritMums Live and he will have 2 days in London for that, which we will also include as a birthday treat as he will be seeing my mother in law and celebrating with her.
The week after that we may have a day out at the Royal Norfolk Show and then the following weekend we are off to the theatre to see Chris and Pui.

AND THEN......
It will be Harry's 2nd birthday!

And then we will be having the mini celebrations with family for that. In a non-nasty way, Harry doesn't have any friends yet so a party isn't necessary for him anyway.
I am hoping to hire a bouncy castle for the boys one day in July, just for them to enjoy together.

Despite knowing Charles is going to have a fantastic birthday even though he isn't having a party I do feel the need to justify myself. I'm not sure why. I guess it's just something we, as parents, feel we need to do a lot when we feel that people are going to judge us based on certain decisions, and based on what people have said in the past.

Do you think children need to have a birthday party?
Am I depriving our children by not giving them a birthday party?